Since I was gone from home yesterday from early morning until late at night, I am writing about day 2 on the morning of day 3. That works, right? Yesterday Jeff and I went up north to play with our cute grandkids so their mama could go to a family wedding. For those of you who are not aware, being a grandma is a blast. I highly recommend you get yourself some grandchildren. I tried to make sure I was prepared and took my shakes and things with me. I did think I'd be home by mid-afternoon, which did not turn out to be the case, but I got by.
I read my scriptures and drank my detox tea in the car. No, I was not driving! Reading about Alma and Amulek gave me so much strength for the day. How thankful I am for the Book of Mormon. My lovely headache flared up again when I woke up, so I had a fizzy stick when we got there and it helped. One thing I need to note, I was hungrier yesterday morning than I expected. But, after my morning shake, I was fine. Can I just say here how much I love my VitaMix? I borrowed my daughter's Ninja blender to make my morning shake and the spinach and coconut oil were quite chunky. Ummmm, not a fan of chunky smoothies! Haha! But I chugged it and lived to tell the tale. Within about 2 hours I was a little hungry again, which I attribute to my grandmothering like a boss. A handful of raw almonds and a lemon fit chew helped a lot and I was good again. It's so great though because my energy stayed really level. I didn't have any peaks and valleys and the hunger was not bad. My headache had calmed and I played store, avoided the hot lava on the living room floor, barked like a seal, cuddled the baby, and colored on the walls of the bathtub and shower all while feeling amazing. By the way, where DO you get those cool bathtub crayons?
That pesky headache returned right as I was leaving and so I drank another fizzy stick as we drove Jeff to work and then I ran back to my mom's which is only 15 minutes from Jeff's office. I made my second smoothie with mom's magic bullet. She didn't have much spinach so I put a lot of parsley in it. This time it was even chunkier and more strange looking. Once again I bravely gulped it down and began to feel better. Two hours later I felt true hunger and ate almonds again and another fit chew. Due to my late night followed by my early morning, I was pretty sleepy by 5, so I stretched out on mom's couch and had a snooze while she read me a pamphlet extolling the virtues of tumeric. 30 minutes later the clock chime woke me up and to my amazement, mom was still reading to me about this extraordinary supplement. Who knew there was so much to say about tumeric?
Now, because I thought I would go home after I dropped Jeff off, I did not have my food for dinner. It's supposed to be a half a plate of greens, with clean protein on 1/4 of the plate and then high quality carbohydrates on a 6th of the plate. At this moment I can't remember what the last thing was supposed to be. Probably a healthy fat. Anyway, Mom didn't have any stuff for that so she let me use her Arbonne shake mix, fiber, greens, and organic frozen berries. I was quite nervous to taste it because my past experience with powdered greens was not good. Whenever I drank them down, they immediately returned the way they'd gone. But, mixed with everything else, I barely noticed them, and that smoothie was quite good. I also ate some more nuts and a fit chew. I picked Jeff up from work at 11 and we drove home. I then understood why they recommend you eat a meal and not just have another shake. I was hungry, it was midnight, and I knew I couldn't sleep being that hungry so I ate a tiny portion of legumes. Now, you're supposed to have 12 hours between dinner and your morning shake, but, you're also supposed to get good sleep, so I hope I made the right choice. By the way, this morning I feel fine and am not as hungry as yesterday, and my headache is gone.
So, I did learn a few things that I will do different next time I'm going to be gone. I will make my shakes at home and take them with me in a cooler. I will either pack food or follow Jocelyn's awesome advice and get a Cafe Rio chicken salad without the rice and dressing but with extra guacamole and extra pico de gallo. All in all, I feel good about yesterday, but will definitely cleanse and detox better today. I'm so excited to make Jocelyn's chili recipe. I think I will keep that on hand so I can take it with me when I'm on the run.
Wednesday, January 6, 2016
Monday, January 4, 2016
Day 1 Clean Eating Challenge
Jan. 4, 2016
Well, here we are in a New Year. My lovely and generous sister, Debbie, is helping me to find a greater level of health and for that I'm truly thankful! So, losing 100 pounds is one thing. Losing the pain in all my joints is something quite different. As I've struggled to maintain my weight loss and to find exercise that doesn't feel like torture to my arthritic joints, I have been led along by my Heavenly Father. Through my own efforts in prayer and study and those of my dear husband Jeff, I have found a few things that seem to help and others that I am hoping will help.
First, I've found a version of Intermittent Fasting, ( I eat between noon and 6 p.m. and fast for 18 hours every day.) that seems to lessen the inflammation in my body, thus reducing pain. This is very hard to do on an ongoing basis when coupled with the lo-carb dieting that I've had to do to keep my weight in check. I find that it is hard to go longer than 2 or 3 weeks before I have a spontaneous break in the action, usually not thought out, and very delicious, but pain and pound inducing. After my trip to Beau and Melanie's the first 10 days of December, I came home in a lot of pain and Jeff told me that he felt strongly that I needed to add green drinks with added protein powder to my diet, possibly 2 a day. I felt he was right, but OH how I've always disliked green drinks and protein powder. I started making them and was drinking 2 a day for about 2 weeks. These consisted of filtered water, spinach, blueberries, whey protein, and soaked chia seeds. These seemed to help me get more energy and after a bit, my pain level started decreasing.
But, Lindi's birthday, Christmas and New Years came along and I found myself eating the treats of the season and not wanting my drink. I also started praying specifically again and asking for guidance. I wanted more knowledge and I wanted to help other people find the answers from Heavenly Father to help them be healthier and happier. This has been my desire ever since I lost the initial 100 pounds. I felt that speaking at BYU Women's Conference was a start, but haven't known where to go from there.
Debbie was talking to me the other day and she offered to help me do the Arbonne Clean Eating Challenge. I prayed over this and while I didn't hear any voices speak to me, I felt that I should proceed and start the challenge with Debbie and Jocelyn (Debbie's awesome DIL). I also felt tons of inspiration pouring in about blogging my experience doing this challenge and doing a podcast after I complete it. Hopefully, I can reach those who Heavenly Father knows I can help.
Today is day one. Of course it is only fitting that I awoke a six a.m. with a pounding headache! It's my sinuses and I decided to forego Sudafed and Excedrin in keeping with this 30 day detox. So this day has been kinda hard to tolerate. The Arbonne shake that I had earlier was a delightful surprise, in that I liked it and it didn't taste yucky like every other protein shake I've had. I'm not going to go into all the reasons Arbonne is so great on this blog. There are places to go and things to read if you want to know about that. This is simply me telling you how it is for me.
So, first thing I did when I woke at six to answer nature's call, was to drink water with my food grade H2O2 drops in it. I do this every day because it keeps away yeast infections and kidney infections, both of which I'm prone to. I buy it at Good Earth. Then of course, I went back to bed, because with a husband working swing and me talking to him when he gets home till 1 a.m. every night, there's really no good reason to get up that early. I used this opportunity of being awake to read a few chapters in the Book of Mormon and to have my morning prayers. This is the impetus that propels my days, and gives me the strength and power to follow God's plan for me. When I got up for real, I had an Arbonne fizzy stick in about 16 ounces of ice and water. It was quite refreshing. Then I had a cup of Arbonne detox tea which I also enjoyed. Later I had the Arbonne pre and probiotics in water. Around 11, I had my first shake/green drink. I used the Abonne chocolate protein powder, spinach, frozen blueberries, chia, coconut oil and a drop or 2 of Doterra peppermint oil. I mix up the water, spinach, and coconut oil first then add the blueberries and chia and blend until really smooth and then last I turn down the blender speed and mix in the protein powder. I don't like it frothy, so that is why I add it last and mix on a low speed.
I felt really even for a couple of hours and then I had a handful of almonds and a couple of cups of Trader Joe's herbal tea. Later I had a yummy lemon Fit Chew from Arbonne. I've never had those before and they are good. In the middle of the afternoon I felt a little hungry so I had another fizzy stick and then I felt great. I realized that in order to get in 2 shakes and a meal I will need to start my shake earlier tomorrow. So I ate my lunch in the late afternoon and I will have a shake right before 7, when they recommend that I stop eating for the night. In that shake, I will also add my Arbonne fiber blend and I may try the vanilla this time. My food meal consisted of 2 eggs scrambled with unsweetened almond milk, sea salt and black pepper. When they were cooked I cut them up into bite sized pieces and mixed them with a tomato, 1/2 cup garbanzo beans, and a few tablespoons of soaked chia seeds. It was really yummy and satisfying. We don't get paid until Thursday so my meal was invented out of clean eating foods I had on hand.
I know that I didn't get all my timing perfect today, but I did get the eating right and it feels very natural and not torturous. Yay! I'm interested to see how hungry I will feel tomorrow morning. I really want to figure this out so that I can be more active and not have my body ache all night. I think that was the biggest surprise when I got my weight off, that I still had tons of pain. So, the initial inspiration I received on me losing 100 pounds was great and now I'm receiving more light and guidance, line upon line, precept upon precept. It is now 5:24 p.m. and my headache is nearly gone. What a blessing.
Well, here we are in a New Year. My lovely and generous sister, Debbie, is helping me to find a greater level of health and for that I'm truly thankful! So, losing 100 pounds is one thing. Losing the pain in all my joints is something quite different. As I've struggled to maintain my weight loss and to find exercise that doesn't feel like torture to my arthritic joints, I have been led along by my Heavenly Father. Through my own efforts in prayer and study and those of my dear husband Jeff, I have found a few things that seem to help and others that I am hoping will help.
First, I've found a version of Intermittent Fasting, ( I eat between noon and 6 p.m. and fast for 18 hours every day.) that seems to lessen the inflammation in my body, thus reducing pain. This is very hard to do on an ongoing basis when coupled with the lo-carb dieting that I've had to do to keep my weight in check. I find that it is hard to go longer than 2 or 3 weeks before I have a spontaneous break in the action, usually not thought out, and very delicious, but pain and pound inducing. After my trip to Beau and Melanie's the first 10 days of December, I came home in a lot of pain and Jeff told me that he felt strongly that I needed to add green drinks with added protein powder to my diet, possibly 2 a day. I felt he was right, but OH how I've always disliked green drinks and protein powder. I started making them and was drinking 2 a day for about 2 weeks. These consisted of filtered water, spinach, blueberries, whey protein, and soaked chia seeds. These seemed to help me get more energy and after a bit, my pain level started decreasing.
But, Lindi's birthday, Christmas and New Years came along and I found myself eating the treats of the season and not wanting my drink. I also started praying specifically again and asking for guidance. I wanted more knowledge and I wanted to help other people find the answers from Heavenly Father to help them be healthier and happier. This has been my desire ever since I lost the initial 100 pounds. I felt that speaking at BYU Women's Conference was a start, but haven't known where to go from there.
Debbie was talking to me the other day and she offered to help me do the Arbonne Clean Eating Challenge. I prayed over this and while I didn't hear any voices speak to me, I felt that I should proceed and start the challenge with Debbie and Jocelyn (Debbie's awesome DIL). I also felt tons of inspiration pouring in about blogging my experience doing this challenge and doing a podcast after I complete it. Hopefully, I can reach those who Heavenly Father knows I can help.
Today is day one. Of course it is only fitting that I awoke a six a.m. with a pounding headache! It's my sinuses and I decided to forego Sudafed and Excedrin in keeping with this 30 day detox. So this day has been kinda hard to tolerate. The Arbonne shake that I had earlier was a delightful surprise, in that I liked it and it didn't taste yucky like every other protein shake I've had. I'm not going to go into all the reasons Arbonne is so great on this blog. There are places to go and things to read if you want to know about that. This is simply me telling you how it is for me.
So, first thing I did when I woke at six to answer nature's call, was to drink water with my food grade H2O2 drops in it. I do this every day because it keeps away yeast infections and kidney infections, both of which I'm prone to. I buy it at Good Earth. Then of course, I went back to bed, because with a husband working swing and me talking to him when he gets home till 1 a.m. every night, there's really no good reason to get up that early. I used this opportunity of being awake to read a few chapters in the Book of Mormon and to have my morning prayers. This is the impetus that propels my days, and gives me the strength and power to follow God's plan for me. When I got up for real, I had an Arbonne fizzy stick in about 16 ounces of ice and water. It was quite refreshing. Then I had a cup of Arbonne detox tea which I also enjoyed. Later I had the Arbonne pre and probiotics in water. Around 11, I had my first shake/green drink. I used the Abonne chocolate protein powder, spinach, frozen blueberries, chia, coconut oil and a drop or 2 of Doterra peppermint oil. I mix up the water, spinach, and coconut oil first then add the blueberries and chia and blend until really smooth and then last I turn down the blender speed and mix in the protein powder. I don't like it frothy, so that is why I add it last and mix on a low speed.
I felt really even for a couple of hours and then I had a handful of almonds and a couple of cups of Trader Joe's herbal tea. Later I had a yummy lemon Fit Chew from Arbonne. I've never had those before and they are good. In the middle of the afternoon I felt a little hungry so I had another fizzy stick and then I felt great. I realized that in order to get in 2 shakes and a meal I will need to start my shake earlier tomorrow. So I ate my lunch in the late afternoon and I will have a shake right before 7, when they recommend that I stop eating for the night. In that shake, I will also add my Arbonne fiber blend and I may try the vanilla this time. My food meal consisted of 2 eggs scrambled with unsweetened almond milk, sea salt and black pepper. When they were cooked I cut them up into bite sized pieces and mixed them with a tomato, 1/2 cup garbanzo beans, and a few tablespoons of soaked chia seeds. It was really yummy and satisfying. We don't get paid until Thursday so my meal was invented out of clean eating foods I had on hand.
I know that I didn't get all my timing perfect today, but I did get the eating right and it feels very natural and not torturous. Yay! I'm interested to see how hungry I will feel tomorrow morning. I really want to figure this out so that I can be more active and not have my body ache all night. I think that was the biggest surprise when I got my weight off, that I still had tons of pain. So, the initial inspiration I received on me losing 100 pounds was great and now I'm receiving more light and guidance, line upon line, precept upon precept. It is now 5:24 p.m. and my headache is nearly gone. What a blessing.
Tuesday, May 12, 2015
Women's Conference Talk by Sara Simmons Hicks
I gave this talk at BYU Women's Conference Thursday, April 30, 2015
This talk does not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of BYU.
We all have moments of clarity in which we see what we really want. One particularly poignant one for me came in January of 2014 when I looked into the perfect face of my new granddaughter Lindi. I saw all the love of generations of mothers, daughters, grandmothers and granddaughters looking into my eyes and I felt something deep, profound and ultimately, life-changing.
As I held this precious baby, I knew that I wanted to be there for her. Really be there for her. I wanted to help her feel joy, I wanted to play with her, I wanted her to know that her grandma loved her and would do anything for her. At that moment I felt trapped in an uncooperative mortal frame. I had a body that was wracked with pain, no energy, and was shrouded in obesity. All the reasons, excuses, shame, and disappointments didn't matter. This perfect little child needed me. The real me. The joyful, happy, fun, and spiritually in-tune me. Someone who could give her love and guidance. Someone who could run, play, hike, swim, sing, and dance with her. Someone who could help her feel her Savior’s love.
For years I had prayed for help. "Heavenly Father, please help me to lose weight. Help me to be strong. Help me to stick to my diet plan. Help me to hate carbs." I had tried mantras, visualization, listened to weight-loss cd's with subliminal messages telling me how much I loved vegetables. I worked my body into a frenzy of exercise. I over-worked it; I injured it; I damaged it; I tried liquid diets, high carb/low-fat diets, low/carb/high fat and protein diets, HCG, fasting, The Up Day/Down Day diet, Atkins, Paleo, Weight Watchers, Overeaters Anonymous, and many more. I can't even remember everything I've tried. They all ended the same. Sara, face first in noodles, french bread, pudding, chocolate, ice cream, cookies, candy, pie, and every yummy thing I could get my hands on until I had gained back all I'd lost and more. I dieted myself into obesity. What started out as an insecure teenager trying to lose 5 pounds she didn’t need to lose, ended as a 49 year-old woman more than 100 pounds overweight.
My prayers started changing after Lindi was born. I began to really ask for guidance. I searched for answers everywhere, but was no longer willing to just try anything anyone suggested. What did Heavenly Father want me to do? What was his plan for me? My moment of clarity was followed by others. I REALLY didn't want to drop dead of a heart attack. I wanted my husband and children to stop being frightened of that happening. I wanted to have the strength and energy to serve the Lord better, to go on missions with my husband. I wanted my attitude toward food to be changed from a pleasure seeking thing to a survival thing. I wanted to find the real me again. Last year, I felt a prompting from the spirit that I needed to attend BYU Women’s Conference, and for the next couple of months I came up with excuses why I didn't need to go. But, my dear husband kept encouraging me to attend and so I did.
My friend and I were parked by the stadium and that walk up the hill to the Marriott Center was the hardest workout I had done in a while. In the opening session I waited in anticipation for Sheri Dew to begin speaking. Her topic was grace and as she spoke, I felt the spirit light my body on fire! I instinctively knew that the answers I was seeking were within my grasp. Understanding of this precious principle enlightened my mind. “The key to unlocking the power of His covenant sons and daughters is His covenant sons and daughters learning to unlock the power of Jesus Christ.” Imagine the Savior in Gethsemane. In that unparalleled and unimaginable act of His infinite atonement, see in your mind a great conduit of light, power and joy being created. In His greatest agony, think of the joy He must have felt for us! That we, His own brothers and sisters could be saved, redeemed, and justified. Through our own obedience and righteousness, we can plug into that source of power, and when we do this, the possibilities for growth, change, and joy are endless. Sheri Dew quoting Elder Bruce Hafen said, “Grace is the divine power that enables us to handle things we can’t figure out, can’t do, can’t overcome, or even manage on our own.” I certainly couldn't figure out or overcome my weight and health problems, despite a long and grueling effort. I felt a jolt of electricity as Sister Dew said these next words. It was one of those moments that the perfect chord in perfect harmony sounded and my mind and heart were completely open to the inspiration that was now flooding in. I am paraphrasing her, “If there are times you think, “I can’t handle for one more day, the urge to eat brownies at midnight!” you are not alone! The Savior’s divine empathy is perfect, so he knows how to help us. With His help, you can resist temptation. With His help, you can become your true self.”
I felt hope beginning in my heart. I felt the gentle voice of the Spirit whispering to me things that I could do starting right then. All throughout that day, I kept receiving inspiration from the spirit. In a later session, Elder Bruce Hafen and his wife, Marie, also presented on grace and the Atonement. This statement clarified the concept of grace for me. “In terms that apply both to forgiveness and to the other conditional blessings of strengthening and perfecting, Nephi said, “It is by grace that we are saved, after all we can do.” Some people think this means the Lord won’t help us until we have totally exhausted ourselves. But the larger doctrinal context makes clear that “after” in this verse means “along with”—His grace is with us before, during, and after, we do all we can.” He is with us THE WHOLE WAY! What a concept!!
That night, my husband and I discussed the things I had learned and felt that day. After he fell asleep, I lay awake long into the night pondering on all I had heard in the talks and by the whisperings of the spirit. I began to pray. As I poured out my soul to Heavenly Father, I found the courage to pray as I never had before. “Please Heavenly Father, I will do ANYTHING you tell me. I will exercise my faith and I will trust that through Thy grace and power, I can do anything you ask of me. Please tell me what to do. I know that I am weak, the very weakest of all, but I know that through Thee, I can have weak things be made strong.” While insomnia claimed me that night, inspiration poured in. Sleep did not come until 2 hours before I had to be up to attend the 2nd day of the conference. A fortuitous text and some tough love from my dear friend in Washington woke me up and convinced me to drag my somewhat uncooperative body from my bed and get myself back up to BYU to, as she so eloquently stated, be there for my friends who wish they could be there and can’t!
That day was like the one before. I was receiving messages from the pulpit and from the Holy Ghost. I took notes on everything I was getting and felt so much hope. It was different too. In the past, starting a new plan would fill me with feverish excitement and misplaced optimism, leading me to make rash financial or dietary decisions which never turned out well. There was a peace and serenity about this experience that convinced me it was coming from the right source. I ran into my sister-in-law Patti that afternoon and we chatted for a bit and like a lot of women do, we talked about losing weight and keeping it off. Patti is a beautiful example of how to do this. She is the mother of a dozen delightful children and she maintains her ideal weight. She said that before she goes to bed each night, she decides exactly what she will eat the next day. The idea of planning each night and being prepared for the next day really hit me as sound advice. Not only could I have the proper food on hand, but even more important, I could prepare myself spiritually the night before so that upon awakening, the strength and power I would need to start my day off correctly would already be in place. This has been crucial to my success! I also make time for some morning spiritual feasting as well. In fact, I nibble throughout the day. But, the desire to do that is nourished by my nighttime study.
Over the next few days I formulated my plan. I prayed over each and every single thing. If I did not receive a yes from Heavenly Father, I didn't incorporate it. The no’s were as interesting and important as the yeses. I prayed about exercise and received a, “Not now.” That surprised me. I’d always start a new program with punishing workouts, sore muscles, and general unhappiness! In fact, I did not receive a prompting to begin exercising until about 4 weeks into my program and even then I was only prompted to walk, slowly at that! Not that I had any alternative at that point! I asked Him if I should weigh myself and how often and got a, “No, you can trust me.” What a relief!! My ability to obsess over the scale is legendary. Through these answers I realized again how compassionate and kind our Father in Heaven is. He was rescuing me from myself by teaching me how to avoid obsessive thinking, unnecessary pain, and a host of other unhealthy habits I’d developed over the years. He gave me my especially tailored for Sara, food plan. He taught me how to control my thoughts by turning to Him, and that my only job was to be obedient to what He told me to do and to any new promptings I received.
One of the promptings I received was to read the Book of Mormon, “Everyday, everyday, everyday!” as Elder Pearson told us in conference. This, above every other thing I do, has made all the difference in the success, happiness, and the peaceful nature of this incredible journey. Anytime I find myself tempted, feeling weak, or not wanting to eat on my plan, or angry, lonely, bored, or sad, I pick up my phone and read in The Book of Mormon. It works! Every single time, it works! Heavenly Father loves us so much he gave us this incredible tool to transform our lives and get close to His son, our Savior Jesus Christ. “Because I want to be like the Savior and I can. I’m reading His instructions, I’m following His plan. Because I want the power his word will give to me. I’m changing how I live, I’m changing what I’ll be! Scripture Power, keeps me safe from sin. Scripture power is the power to win. Scripture power, every day I need, the power that I get each time I read.”
There are 3 easy things that help me to stop food thoughts, self-criticism, or anything of a negative nature that comes into my mind. The first is to pray for His grace to give me strength and power. Second, I read the Book of Mormon, and if I can’t do that then third, I sing a hymn. My go-to hymn is How Firm a Foundation. If I’m in a public place with people all around me, I hum it quietly. This is a very effective way to get through Costco without grabbing chocolate and caramel covered macadamia nut clusters. I apologize for inserting that tempting image into your minds but I need to impress upon you the incredible power in the hymns! So there you have it! Pray, read, and sing!
The spirit prompted me to start my reading in Ether. I didn't know why, but as I read it became clear. Through the fervent prayers and faithfulness of the brother of Jared, his family and friends are spared having their language confounded at the tower of Babel. God tells him to gather his family, friends and all their supplies and head to the valley northward. Once there, the Lord talks to the brother of Jared in a cloud and tells him that He will go before them and show them everything that they should do. This struck me so powerfully, I began to weep. I knew the Lord was telling me that he would lead me along. I may not know the course of the journey I was taking, but He would lead me and I could put my trust in Him.
After the Lord leads the Jaredites through the wilderness, they arrive at the seashore. The Lord tells the brother of Jared to build 8 barges to carry them across the great waters. He shows him exactly how to build them so that they will be tight and so that water cannot get in. As I pondered this, I thought of Nephi and his family and their journey into the wilderness. Their experience was very different than the Jaredites' experience. Nephi's family went through rebellions and hardships and actually took twice as long to reach the sea. The Lord commanded Nephi to build a ship and He instructed him exactly how to build it. It was nothing like the brother of Jared's barges, yet Nephi's ship took his family safely to the promise land, just like the barges safely took the Jaredites there. We all have our own unique ship for the journey. It will not be quite like anyone else's. If I turn to the Lord, he will show me the way and will help me to build my own perfect ship to carry me to my promised land of physical and spiritual health.
Our Father in Heaven is the master physician. He knows our bodies and our spirits. He knows our weaknesses and our strengths and He knows how to help us reach our physical and spiritual goals. I know that reaching my physical goals would be impossible without making it a spiritual journey as well. Listen to His voice and He will craft for you the perfect vessel to help you reach your righteous desires. One amazing thing for me this year is that I’m no longer tempted to try those incredible diet plans that I see on magazines in the supermarket, or buy that fantastically expensive product that my friend swears by, or to purchase gym memberships that go largely unused. I have also learned that if it comes from the Father it will be simple, relatively inexpensive, and readily available.
Don’t confuse the term simple with easy! It’s the hardest, yet most simple thing I've ever done. But, here is the miracle. He has carried my burden. He has made it light indeed. I truly have not felt it on my back. Just as Alma’s people could not be immediately rescued from bondage, neither could I. They learned to rely on the Lord for strength, so have I. They had to suffer consequences for their former wickedness, so have I.
At some point on your journey, you may hit a plateau. It’s then helpful to reassess everything you’re doing. Am I following the plan God gave me with exactness? In Alma 37 he is talking to his son Helaman about the Liahona and how it worked for Lehi’s family according to their faith in God. Because miracles were worked by small means they were sometimes slothful and forgot to be faithful and diligent. Then those marvelous works ceased, they did not progress in their journey, and they were afflicted with hunger and thirst! But, if they gave it strict heed it would point them in a direct course to the promise land.Obeying with exactness will put wind in your sails and propel you forward. So will reaching out to others and helping them on their journeys by easing their burdens.
It is essential to focus on gospel principles and doctrine. If I have a day where I stray a little, rather than beat myself up or think endlessly about why I did this or ate that, I get into my scriptures and those missteps become non-events. Quoting Elder Boyd K Packer, “The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker than a study of behavior will improve behavior.” Don’t allow mistakes or impatience to put you at war with yourself. The mind must be mastered before any positive physical change can occur. In Alma 31:5 it states: “And now, as the preaching of the word had a great tendency to lead the people to do that which was just—yea, it had had more powerful effect upon the minds of the people than the sword, or anything else, which had happened unto them—therefore Alma thought it was expedient that they should try the virtue of the word of God.” We must embrace the love and peace available in The Word to end the destructive war, encouraged by Satan, which goes on inside of our own heads. Cling to the word and claim the power that is there for you in His holy scriptures!
That we may improve in both physical and spiritual health is my prayer and my passion. May we follow Moroni’s clarion call to come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Sunday, September 14, 2014
He Doth Nourish Them and Strengthen Them
Have you ever had a sudden flash of perfect understanding? When all the things you've studied and read about a particular subject suddenly come into focus and you know exactly what is right for you to do? The spirit works this way with me sometimes. Because of my struggles with weight over the years, I have read many, many books and articles that have to do with health, dieting, fitness, and nutrition. Sometimes having an obsession with one subject can lead to a lot of confusion. I'm reminded of the words of Joseph Smith in his history, chapter 1 verse 5. Read it here. He is talking about the religious tumult in the region where they lived that was causing divisions among the people, some crying, "Lo here!" and others, "Lo there!" That's exactly how it is when it comes to the subject of good health, nutrition, diet, and fitness. People develop a religious fervor about whatever ideas they have espoused. Try telling a vegan that you don't agree with their choice of diet for yourself. Any valid reasons you offer are quickly discounted and discarded and you are left feeling like a lesser mortal who's intelligence and ability to reason things out for yourself are wanting. Some even hint that you are not quite righteous! Try telling a runner that, that type of exercise actually causes you constant injuries. They will extol the virtues of their lifestyle and the benefits of "the runner's high" until you feel quite ashamed that your own joints won't allow you to partake of that particular "drug." While I am thrilled for people who have found the thing that works well for them and brings them the health and happiness they desire, that religious fervor can actually lead the hearer to feel cynicism, anger, confusion, and guilt. (It actually makes me want to do the opposite! Am I rebellious?)
While I was praying for direction for my food plan, I had one of those flashes of perfect understanding. The prescription that would work for my obese, middle-aged, insulin resistant body was a very simple diet consisting mainly of protein and high water content vegetables. This doesn't mean that there aren't a host of wonderful nutrients in fruits, nuts, grains, and starchy vegetables. It means that for my particular health issues, it is best for me to leave them alone during this phase of my journey. If I get a kidney infection, the doctor will prescribe an antibiotic for me to take for a specified period of time to clear up the infection. This does not mean I should take that antibiotic forever, nor does it mean when my neighbor comes down with an earache, I should insist that he take my prescription because it "worked so well for me!" I CAN however, refer him to my doctor who took such good care of me. That is what I'm doing. I'm referring you to the Great Physician to help you with your own unique and personal health issues.
As I prayed over the inspiration I'd received, specifics began to be revealed to me. I was led by the spirit to read Ether, in the Book of Mormon. Read it here. In Ether, Jared, his brother and their families and friends are spared having their language confounded during the time of the tower of Babel through the fervent prayers and faithfulness of the brother of Jared. God tells the brother of Jared to gather his family, friends and all their supplies and head to the valley northward and he will meet them there. Once there, the Lord talks to the brother of Jared in a cloud and tells him that He will go before them and show them every thing that they should do. This struck me so powerfully, I began to weep. I knew the Lord was telling me that he would lead me along. I may not know the course of the journey I was taking, but He would lead me and I could put my trust in Him. When I want to talk to God, I pray. When I want to hear his voice, I read the scriptures. It always works. I find the greatest strength and help from reading and pondering the scriptures. As I feast on them, my need to feast on food disappears. Anger and confusion disappear, obsessive thoughts disappear, and I am left with a deep and abiding peace.
After the Lord leads the brother of Jared and his family and friends through the wilderness, they arrive at the seashore. The Lord tells the brother of Jared to build 8 barges to carry them across the waters. He shows him exactly how to build them so that they will be tight and so that water cannot get in. As I pondered this, I thought of Nephi and his family and their journey into the wilderness. Their experience was very different that the Jaredites' experience. Nephi's family went through rebellions and hardships and actually took twice as long to reach the sea. Read it here. (1 Nephi 2-4, 7, 16-18) The Lord commanded Nephi to build a ship and He instructed him exactly how to build it. It was nothing like the brother of Jared's barges, yet Nephi's ship took his family safely to the promised land, just like the barges safely took the Jaredites there. I realized that we all have our own journey. It will not look quite like someone else's. If I turn to the Lord, he will show me the way and will help me to build the perfect ship to carry me to my promised land of health and wellness. All I have to do is trust Him and be obedient to His commandments and follow the promptings of the Spirit.
He keeps me safe from misplaced enthusiasm to try everything that worked for someone else. This also saves me a great deal of money! I have noticed that for me personally, if it comes from Heavenly Father, it is not expensive to do, and the plan is quite simple. I am urged to beware of 'evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the latter days." (Doctrine and Covenants 89:4) People seem to want my money all the time! Being overweight for a good number of years has made me the target of those who earn a living selling promises to the desperate and heavy. I'm sure many of them have good intentions, and if you can afford their product, I wish you well. However, I know that the Lord has the perfect plan for each of us and we can save ourselves a lot of pain and disappointment if we will only listen to Him.
I buy the best quality food I can afford on my budget and I pray over everything I eat. I am reminded of something amusing my sister Debbie's friend told her. She prays, "Heavenly Father, this is the best food I can afford. Please bless it to make us healthy and strong anyway!" The majority of my food is in as natural a state as possible and I try to avoid much processed or packaged foods. I use mainly fresh produce, but occasionally frozen. Obviously, I buy meat in a package because I'm not a hunter, fisherman, or rancher with a talent for butchering beef and chickens! I have prayed and been inspired over all the vitamins, minerals, oils, and herbs I take. Each one was specifically revealed to me and in a way that is easy for me to get hold of. I use Active Vitamin Packs, Flax Seed Oil, and another vitamin D capsule every morning. I use Metamucil Fiber supplements every morning and night. One half hour to two hours before every meal, I take one garcinia cambogia capsule and one green coffee bean tablet. Every morning and afternoon I drink a Zip Fizz. All of these supplements I purchase at Costco. (No, they are NOT paying me to say that.)
I eat 3 small meals a day consisting of about 2-5 ounces of meat and a cup or two of vegetables and I do not snack between meals. I use butter salt, pepper and spices and a little dressing on the side. I eat very slowly and listen for the very subtle internal voice that tells me I've had enough. This takes a while to cultivate, but it does come and is a very useful tool and guide. I was amazed at how much less food my body became satisfied on. I really ate a lot before, even when I thought I was eating "right." Because studies show that middle aged women are perpetually in a state of slight dehydration because of leaky cell walls, I alkalize all the water I drink. This has been shown to help heal these cell walls. I cut lemons and limes into quarters and squeeze one quarter into every glass of water I drink, in my Zip Fizz, and my fiber supplement. This allows my body to drop fat more easily.
Please do not think that I'm advocating my food plan for everyone. I'm absolutely not doing that. Heavenly Father may show you a completely different plan for your "ship." Don't be afraid to come unto Him and do what He inspires you to do. He loves us all. We are His children and He desires to bless us.
While I was praying for direction for my food plan, I had one of those flashes of perfect understanding. The prescription that would work for my obese, middle-aged, insulin resistant body was a very simple diet consisting mainly of protein and high water content vegetables. This doesn't mean that there aren't a host of wonderful nutrients in fruits, nuts, grains, and starchy vegetables. It means that for my particular health issues, it is best for me to leave them alone during this phase of my journey. If I get a kidney infection, the doctor will prescribe an antibiotic for me to take for a specified period of time to clear up the infection. This does not mean I should take that antibiotic forever, nor does it mean when my neighbor comes down with an earache, I should insist that he take my prescription because it "worked so well for me!" I CAN however, refer him to my doctor who took such good care of me. That is what I'm doing. I'm referring you to the Great Physician to help you with your own unique and personal health issues.
 |
| Call the doctor! I need help! |
As I prayed over the inspiration I'd received, specifics began to be revealed to me. I was led by the spirit to read Ether, in the Book of Mormon. Read it here. In Ether, Jared, his brother and their families and friends are spared having their language confounded during the time of the tower of Babel through the fervent prayers and faithfulness of the brother of Jared. God tells the brother of Jared to gather his family, friends and all their supplies and head to the valley northward and he will meet them there. Once there, the Lord talks to the brother of Jared in a cloud and tells him that He will go before them and show them every thing that they should do. This struck me so powerfully, I began to weep. I knew the Lord was telling me that he would lead me along. I may not know the course of the journey I was taking, but He would lead me and I could put my trust in Him. When I want to talk to God, I pray. When I want to hear his voice, I read the scriptures. It always works. I find the greatest strength and help from reading and pondering the scriptures. As I feast on them, my need to feast on food disappears. Anger and confusion disappear, obsessive thoughts disappear, and I am left with a deep and abiding peace.
After the Lord leads the brother of Jared and his family and friends through the wilderness, they arrive at the seashore. The Lord tells the brother of Jared to build 8 barges to carry them across the waters. He shows him exactly how to build them so that they will be tight and so that water cannot get in. As I pondered this, I thought of Nephi and his family and their journey into the wilderness. Their experience was very different that the Jaredites' experience. Nephi's family went through rebellions and hardships and actually took twice as long to reach the sea. Read it here. (1 Nephi 2-4, 7, 16-18) The Lord commanded Nephi to build a ship and He instructed him exactly how to build it. It was nothing like the brother of Jared's barges, yet Nephi's ship took his family safely to the promised land, just like the barges safely took the Jaredites there. I realized that we all have our own journey. It will not look quite like someone else's. If I turn to the Lord, he will show me the way and will help me to build the perfect ship to carry me to my promised land of health and wellness. All I have to do is trust Him and be obedient to His commandments and follow the promptings of the Spirit.
He keeps me safe from misplaced enthusiasm to try everything that worked for someone else. This also saves me a great deal of money! I have noticed that for me personally, if it comes from Heavenly Father, it is not expensive to do, and the plan is quite simple. I am urged to beware of 'evils and designs which do and will exist in the hearts of conspiring men in the latter days." (Doctrine and Covenants 89:4) People seem to want my money all the time! Being overweight for a good number of years has made me the target of those who earn a living selling promises to the desperate and heavy. I'm sure many of them have good intentions, and if you can afford their product, I wish you well. However, I know that the Lord has the perfect plan for each of us and we can save ourselves a lot of pain and disappointment if we will only listen to Him.
I buy the best quality food I can afford on my budget and I pray over everything I eat. I am reminded of something amusing my sister Debbie's friend told her. She prays, "Heavenly Father, this is the best food I can afford. Please bless it to make us healthy and strong anyway!" The majority of my food is in as natural a state as possible and I try to avoid much processed or packaged foods. I use mainly fresh produce, but occasionally frozen. Obviously, I buy meat in a package because I'm not a hunter, fisherman, or rancher with a talent for butchering beef and chickens! I have prayed and been inspired over all the vitamins, minerals, oils, and herbs I take. Each one was specifically revealed to me and in a way that is easy for me to get hold of. I use Active Vitamin Packs, Flax Seed Oil, and another vitamin D capsule every morning. I use Metamucil Fiber supplements every morning and night. One half hour to two hours before every meal, I take one garcinia cambogia capsule and one green coffee bean tablet. Every morning and afternoon I drink a Zip Fizz. All of these supplements I purchase at Costco. (No, they are NOT paying me to say that.)
I eat 3 small meals a day consisting of about 2-5 ounces of meat and a cup or two of vegetables and I do not snack between meals. I use butter salt, pepper and spices and a little dressing on the side. I eat very slowly and listen for the very subtle internal voice that tells me I've had enough. This takes a while to cultivate, but it does come and is a very useful tool and guide. I was amazed at how much less food my body became satisfied on. I really ate a lot before, even when I thought I was eating "right." Because studies show that middle aged women are perpetually in a state of slight dehydration because of leaky cell walls, I alkalize all the water I drink. This has been shown to help heal these cell walls. I cut lemons and limes into quarters and squeeze one quarter into every glass of water I drink, in my Zip Fizz, and my fiber supplement. This allows my body to drop fat more easily.
Please do not think that I'm advocating my food plan for everyone. I'm absolutely not doing that. Heavenly Father may show you a completely different plan for your "ship." Don't be afraid to come unto Him and do what He inspires you to do. He loves us all. We are His children and He desires to bless us.
 |
| "Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest." |
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
Lord I Believe, Help Thou My Unbelief
We all have moments of clarity in which we see what it is that we really want. One particularly poignant one for me came in January of 2014 when I looked into the perfect face of my new granddaughter Lindi. I saw all the love of generations of mothers, daughters, grandmothers and granddaughters looking into my eyes and I felt something deep and profound and ultimately, life-changing.
I sat there holding this precious baby and I knew that I wanted to be there for her. Really be there for her. I wanted to help her feel joy, I wanted to play with her, I wanted her to know that her grandma loved her and would do anything for her. At that moment I felt trapped in an uncooperative mortal frame. I had a body that was wracked with pain, no energy, and was shrouded in obesity. All the reasons, excuses, shame, and disappointments didn't matter. This little perfect child needed me. The real me. Sara. The joyful, happy, fun, and spiritually in-tune Sara. Someone who could give her positive love and guidance. Someone who could run, play, hike, swim, sing, and dance with her. Someone who could teach her about the love of The Savior.
For years I had prayed for help. "Heavenly Father, please help me to lose weight. Help me to be strong. Help me to stick to my diet plan. Help me to hate carbs." I had tried mantras, visualization, listened to weight-loss cd's with subliminal messages that told me how much I loved vegetables. I worked my body into a frenzy of exercise. I over-worked it; I injured it; I damaged it; I tried liquid diets, high carb/low-fat diets, low/carb/high fat and protein diets, HCG, fasting, The Up Day/Down Day diet, Atkins, Paleo, Weight Watchers, Overeaters Anonymous, and a lot of other permutations of this list. I can't even remember everything I've tried. They all ended the same. Sara, face first in noodles, french bread, pudding, chocolate, ice cream, cookies, candy, pie, and every yummy thing I could get my hands on until I had gained back all I'd lost and more. I dieted myself into obesity. What started out as an insecure teenager trying to lose 5 pounds so her mom would quit telling her. her 110 pound body was getting a "square bottom" ended as a 49 year-old woman more than 100 pounds overweight.
My prayers started changing after Lindi was born. I began to really ask for guidance. I searched for answers everywhere, but was no longer willing to just try anything anyone suggested. What did Heavenly Father want me to do? What was his plan for me? My moment of clarity was followed by others. I REALLY didn't want to drop dead of a heart attack. I wanted my husband and children to stop being frightened of that happening. I wanted to have the strength and energy to serve the Lord better, to go on missions with my husband. I wanted my attitude toward food to be changed from a pleasure seeking thing to a survival thing. I wanted to find the real me again.
Around March, a friend of mine stood in Relief Society, (a church organization for women,) one Sunday and told us about the upcoming BYU Women's Conference that was to be held in May and she passed out cards with the information on it and how to sign up. I felt a prompting from the spirit that I needed to be there. I took my card home and put it on the nightstand beside my bed and then every time I looked at it for the next couple of months I came up with excuses why I didn't need to go. Later, I found out that this same friend was actually presenting at the conference and my desire to go greatly increased. I knew that she'd be singing and I didn't want to miss that. Then I forgot about it again and didn't think of it until a few days before the conference. By then it was too late to sign up online, which meant I'd have to go early on the morning of the conference and stand in line to get registered and get my badge. I really didn't want to do that. But, my dear husband kept encouraging me to attend, and I thought that if I could convince a friend to go with me, then I could get there. So I called one of my good friends and she said she could go with me for the first day, and she even offered to drive!
Walking from the parking lot up the hill to the Marriott Center was the hardest workout I'd done in a long time, but I made it and didn't embarrass myself by passing out in the road or anything ridiculously dramatic like that. As I sat in that huge room with 20 to 30 thousand other women, browsing my conference guide, I was thrilled, and ecstatic to discover that Sheri Dew was to be the keynote speaker of that session. As she spoke on grace, I was mesmerized. I sat there hearing and learning things that I had never before understood very well. I tried to take notes, but it frustrated me to have my attention diverted from her face on that huge monitor for even a second. You can read her talk here. I felt hope beginning in my heart. I felt the gentle voice of the Spirit whispering to me things that I could do starting right then. All throughout that day, I kept receiving inspiration from the spirit. In a later session, Elder Bruce Hafen and his wife also presented on grace and the Atonement. Because of Sheri's talk, I was able to understand the Hafen's deep and doctrine-filled talk more fully, although I knew I'd need to go back and study it more deeply. Read their talk here. When I was in bed that night, I discussed with my husband the things I had heard and felt that day. After he went to sleep I prayed like I'd never had the courage to pray before. "Please Heavenly Father, I will do ANYTHING you tell me. I will have faith and I know that through Thy grace and power, I can do anything you ask of me. Please tell me what to do. I know that I am weak, the very weakest of all, but I KNOW through Thee, I can have those weak things be made strong."
That night I had a bad case of insomnia. I did pray a lot, and I did receive guidance, but when I awoke after only 2 hours of sleep, my head was pounding and my body hurt all over. I decided I couldn't possibly get to the second day of the conference. As I lay there, a dear, dear friend and buddy texted me from Washington. I told her I felt rotten and didn't think I could force myself to go. She answered, "Get up and get to that conference for those of us who wish they could be there and can't!" So I did!
My friend couldn't go that day so another friend told me I could come and find her and her daughter and sit with them. I was late, but I got there. That second day was more of the same. I felt promptings and help from the spirit all day long. During a break between sessions, I forced myself to trudge up the 10 million stairs to the top of the Marriott Center to find the restroom and buy some lunch. While I was out there, I ran into my dear sister-in-law Patti. We talked for a bit and like most women do, we talked about how to lose weight and maintain that loss. She is a beautiful woman with a dozen children, that maintains her ideal body weight. She said something that struck me really hard and gave me direction as to what to do with all the promptings and inspiration I'd been receiving. She said, "Before I go to bed each night, I decide exactly what and how much I am going to eat the next day." Now, that isn't exactly what I felt I was to do, but the idea of being prepared for each new day struck me with great force. I could prepare by having the proper food in the house, the supplements I'd need, and most of all, to prepare myself spiritually each night before sleep and again when I awoke in the morning. I would know my plan for the next day before I even went to sleep. That way, the next morning, the decisions were already made and more easily kept.
After the conference I began to formulate my plan. I prayed over each thing and would not add it if I didn't receive a yes from Heavenly Father. The things he didn't have me add were as interesting and important as the things he did. I prayed about exercise and received a, "Not now." That surprised me. I was so used to starting out a new program with punishing workouts, sore muscles, and general unhappiness. I asked if I should weigh myself and how often, and I got a, "No, you can trust me." What a relief. In the past, my ability to obsess over what the scale said was legendary. If I lost a lot, then I deserved a reward. If it showed no loss, then I sucked and why try? Nothing worked anyway! As I received answers to my questions, it was borne in upon me of how compassionate and kind our Father in Heaven is. He was rescuing me from myself! He was teaching me how to avoid obsessive thinking, unnecessary pain, and a host of other unhealthy habits I'd developed over the years.
He gave me my food plan, and taught me how to control my thoughts by turning to Him. He taught me that my only job in all this was to be obedient to what he told me and to new promptings I received. Remember, Heavenly Father doesn't give you everything at once. He sends it in small and doable doses. He really does love us and wants to help us receive the righteous desires of our hearts. Mormons tend to get mixed up about grace because of the phrase, ".....after all we can do. " I tended to think I had to do everything myself and when I'd proven myself, then He would help me. It certainly went along with the attitude of self-reliance we are taught to have. This is wrong thinking! He is with us before during and after. THE WHOLE WAY! My duty is to remember Him, obey Him, and follow His guidance, and He will carry my burden. He will take my burden of food addiction and HE will carry it. "All I can do" is come unto Him. I have three easy ways that he has shown me to control my thoughts. I do these things if I have a random food thought or craving, if I start to think negatively or become angry, If I start to obsess over how long will it take, or how much will I lose, or any thing like that. They are 1. Read my scriptures. The Book of Mormon has become my lifeline. I've read it 2.5 times in the past 4 months. I have it on my iPhone so it is always with me. 2. Pray for grace and to be strengthened. I pray for His peace and His power numerous times every day. 3. Sing or hum a hymn. My personal go-to hymn is "How Firm a Foundation" found here. I have used it since I was a little girl when I got nightmares at night. It has always brought me peace and comfort. It is especially helpful and effective when I have to grocery shop and pass by yummy looking treats. If you hear me humming in Costco, you'll know why!
This is the very beginning of my journey. In later posts I will share a more detailed description of how I eat and the supplements I use. This is not intended to be a list. I have hesitated until now to share my plan because it is so personal to me. Heavenly Father is the greatest physician of all and I feel like this plan is His prescription to heal Sara's body. When I have received healing, I have no doubt he will reveal to me my own wellness plan. I have no desire to make anyone feel like I think they should do what I do. My dear sister has prayed for direction to deal with her health issues and has received a completely different plan than mine, and she is experiencing her own miracles. Don't be afraid to get on your knees and ask for your own prescription!
I sat there holding this precious baby and I knew that I wanted to be there for her. Really be there for her. I wanted to help her feel joy, I wanted to play with her, I wanted her to know that her grandma loved her and would do anything for her. At that moment I felt trapped in an uncooperative mortal frame. I had a body that was wracked with pain, no energy, and was shrouded in obesity. All the reasons, excuses, shame, and disappointments didn't matter. This little perfect child needed me. The real me. Sara. The joyful, happy, fun, and spiritually in-tune Sara. Someone who could give her positive love and guidance. Someone who could run, play, hike, swim, sing, and dance with her. Someone who could teach her about the love of The Savior.
For years I had prayed for help. "Heavenly Father, please help me to lose weight. Help me to be strong. Help me to stick to my diet plan. Help me to hate carbs." I had tried mantras, visualization, listened to weight-loss cd's with subliminal messages that told me how much I loved vegetables. I worked my body into a frenzy of exercise. I over-worked it; I injured it; I damaged it; I tried liquid diets, high carb/low-fat diets, low/carb/high fat and protein diets, HCG, fasting, The Up Day/Down Day diet, Atkins, Paleo, Weight Watchers, Overeaters Anonymous, and a lot of other permutations of this list. I can't even remember everything I've tried. They all ended the same. Sara, face first in noodles, french bread, pudding, chocolate, ice cream, cookies, candy, pie, and every yummy thing I could get my hands on until I had gained back all I'd lost and more. I dieted myself into obesity. What started out as an insecure teenager trying to lose 5 pounds so her mom would quit telling her. her 110 pound body was getting a "square bottom" ended as a 49 year-old woman more than 100 pounds overweight.
My prayers started changing after Lindi was born. I began to really ask for guidance. I searched for answers everywhere, but was no longer willing to just try anything anyone suggested. What did Heavenly Father want me to do? What was his plan for me? My moment of clarity was followed by others. I REALLY didn't want to drop dead of a heart attack. I wanted my husband and children to stop being frightened of that happening. I wanted to have the strength and energy to serve the Lord better, to go on missions with my husband. I wanted my attitude toward food to be changed from a pleasure seeking thing to a survival thing. I wanted to find the real me again.
Around March, a friend of mine stood in Relief Society, (a church organization for women,) one Sunday and told us about the upcoming BYU Women's Conference that was to be held in May and she passed out cards with the information on it and how to sign up. I felt a prompting from the spirit that I needed to be there. I took my card home and put it on the nightstand beside my bed and then every time I looked at it for the next couple of months I came up with excuses why I didn't need to go. Later, I found out that this same friend was actually presenting at the conference and my desire to go greatly increased. I knew that she'd be singing and I didn't want to miss that. Then I forgot about it again and didn't think of it until a few days before the conference. By then it was too late to sign up online, which meant I'd have to go early on the morning of the conference and stand in line to get registered and get my badge. I really didn't want to do that. But, my dear husband kept encouraging me to attend, and I thought that if I could convince a friend to go with me, then I could get there. So I called one of my good friends and she said she could go with me for the first day, and she even offered to drive!
 |
| Me, My Nightingale-Voiced Friend, My Dear Friend Who Got Me There |
Walking from the parking lot up the hill to the Marriott Center was the hardest workout I'd done in a long time, but I made it and didn't embarrass myself by passing out in the road or anything ridiculously dramatic like that. As I sat in that huge room with 20 to 30 thousand other women, browsing my conference guide, I was thrilled, and ecstatic to discover that Sheri Dew was to be the keynote speaker of that session. As she spoke on grace, I was mesmerized. I sat there hearing and learning things that I had never before understood very well. I tried to take notes, but it frustrated me to have my attention diverted from her face on that huge monitor for even a second. You can read her talk here. I felt hope beginning in my heart. I felt the gentle voice of the Spirit whispering to me things that I could do starting right then. All throughout that day, I kept receiving inspiration from the spirit. In a later session, Elder Bruce Hafen and his wife also presented on grace and the Atonement. Because of Sheri's talk, I was able to understand the Hafen's deep and doctrine-filled talk more fully, although I knew I'd need to go back and study it more deeply. Read their talk here. When I was in bed that night, I discussed with my husband the things I had heard and felt that day. After he went to sleep I prayed like I'd never had the courage to pray before. "Please Heavenly Father, I will do ANYTHING you tell me. I will have faith and I know that through Thy grace and power, I can do anything you ask of me. Please tell me what to do. I know that I am weak, the very weakest of all, but I KNOW through Thee, I can have those weak things be made strong."
That night I had a bad case of insomnia. I did pray a lot, and I did receive guidance, but when I awoke after only 2 hours of sleep, my head was pounding and my body hurt all over. I decided I couldn't possibly get to the second day of the conference. As I lay there, a dear, dear friend and buddy texted me from Washington. I told her I felt rotten and didn't think I could force myself to go. She answered, "Get up and get to that conference for those of us who wish they could be there and can't!" So I did!
My friend couldn't go that day so another friend told me I could come and find her and her daughter and sit with them. I was late, but I got there. That second day was more of the same. I felt promptings and help from the spirit all day long. During a break between sessions, I forced myself to trudge up the 10 million stairs to the top of the Marriott Center to find the restroom and buy some lunch. While I was out there, I ran into my dear sister-in-law Patti. We talked for a bit and like most women do, we talked about how to lose weight and maintain that loss. She is a beautiful woman with a dozen children, that maintains her ideal body weight. She said something that struck me really hard and gave me direction as to what to do with all the promptings and inspiration I'd been receiving. She said, "Before I go to bed each night, I decide exactly what and how much I am going to eat the next day." Now, that isn't exactly what I felt I was to do, but the idea of being prepared for each new day struck me with great force. I could prepare by having the proper food in the house, the supplements I'd need, and most of all, to prepare myself spiritually each night before sleep and again when I awoke in the morning. I would know my plan for the next day before I even went to sleep. That way, the next morning, the decisions were already made and more easily kept.
 |
| 2nd Day of Women's Conference |
He gave me my food plan, and taught me how to control my thoughts by turning to Him. He taught me that my only job in all this was to be obedient to what he told me and to new promptings I received. Remember, Heavenly Father doesn't give you everything at once. He sends it in small and doable doses. He really does love us and wants to help us receive the righteous desires of our hearts. Mormons tend to get mixed up about grace because of the phrase, ".....after all we can do. " I tended to think I had to do everything myself and when I'd proven myself, then He would help me. It certainly went along with the attitude of self-reliance we are taught to have. This is wrong thinking! He is with us before during and after. THE WHOLE WAY! My duty is to remember Him, obey Him, and follow His guidance, and He will carry my burden. He will take my burden of food addiction and HE will carry it. "All I can do" is come unto Him. I have three easy ways that he has shown me to control my thoughts. I do these things if I have a random food thought or craving, if I start to think negatively or become angry, If I start to obsess over how long will it take, or how much will I lose, or any thing like that. They are 1. Read my scriptures. The Book of Mormon has become my lifeline. I've read it 2.5 times in the past 4 months. I have it on my iPhone so it is always with me. 2. Pray for grace and to be strengthened. I pray for His peace and His power numerous times every day. 3. Sing or hum a hymn. My personal go-to hymn is "How Firm a Foundation" found here. I have used it since I was a little girl when I got nightmares at night. It has always brought me peace and comfort. It is especially helpful and effective when I have to grocery shop and pass by yummy looking treats. If you hear me humming in Costco, you'll know why!
This is the very beginning of my journey. In later posts I will share a more detailed description of how I eat and the supplements I use. This is not intended to be a list. I have hesitated until now to share my plan because it is so personal to me. Heavenly Father is the greatest physician of all and I feel like this plan is His prescription to heal Sara's body. When I have received healing, I have no doubt he will reveal to me my own wellness plan. I have no desire to make anyone feel like I think they should do what I do. My dear sister has prayed for direction to deal with her health issues and has received a completely different plan than mine, and she is experiencing her own miracles. Don't be afraid to get on your knees and ask for your own prescription!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)